Tuesday 27 August 2013

Life As A Widower.

So I was walking through King's Cross Station on a beautiful Sunday morning (as you do) and saw a familiar face that I had seen before, not in person, but on beautiful photographs online, accompanying some of the rawest texts that I could sympathise with and relate to.

I saw the blogger of Life As A Widower, Ben Brooks-Dutton (Brooks was his wife's Desreen name, which she kept after they got married). Last November, his wife Desreen died in a car collision. Ben was able to push his son and get out of the way, but Desreen sadly did not make it.

I followed his story quite early on, maybe from January or February? Either way, a friend of mine 'liked' his page on Facebook and so I liked it too and followed his journey through grief and raising his son as a single father.

I saw Ben, I smiled and looked at him for a while (awkward action, also a bit creepy for anyone to do). And I went up to him and we just talked.

I had to praise him, for his courage to lay it all out for the world to read, because grieving, it's ups and downs, the pain that comes and goes, the frustration, rage and hopelessness that also accompanies it, is all too real and not many people talk about it as they should be.

I shared my own personal experience about my brother's death and Ben was incredibly sympathetic. I really appreciated our brief chat.

Death and the circumstances surrounding it should never be swept under the carpet.

Grief should never be hidden.